In honor of the "12 Days of Christmas" I thought I would list my "12 Pretend Husbands" - these are the men that are only husbands in my mind. I haven't met most of them. (these are not in any order of importance)


12. Hugh Jackman - Funny, Warm, Talented, Charming - I saw him in "the Boy from Oz" on stage on he was so magnetic. (and he sings too)

11. Alec Baldwin - Lord knows I love a handsome fuzzy man. I love both the young Alex Baldwin I fell in love with (if you haven't seen Miami Blues - OMG he was so hot). The older rounder Alec is still a gorgeous man. I love his liberal brain as well and a talented actor/comedian to boot.

10. Dan Savage - Ballsy, Out there, his opinions and brain seems linked to mine. I've met him in person a few times. Just the person you hope he is. Love him and all he does for the GLBT community.

9. Matt Taibi - Hansome, funny and the champion of calling Wall Street and the Banks on their bullsh*t. A talented writer. I love his big....brain.

8. Tom Hardy - those lips, the crazy unpredictability. He's a wild card. From handsome model type man to muscle tattoed hot man in WARRIOR. What isn't to love. He's the bad boy you're not sure what he'll do next. (and I love an accent)

7. Jon Stewart - So funny and charming. I love his work and have always thought he was very handsome in an off kilter kind of way. I have a feeling I'd be star struck in person if I saw him at Starbucks.

6. Bill Maher - I am not physically attracted to Bill Maher but I love his guts. He says a lot of what I think and doesn't care who he offends. I think he's really funny. A free speech martyr. When I met him I was so starstruck I acted like an idiot.

5. Ewan Macgregor - So adorable. What can you say. Love him in everything he does.

4. Henry Rollins - Young or old. KICK ASS. A punk rock man with a brain. Hell yeah.

3. Gavin Creel - Not traditionally my type at all. He's so adorable and love his voice. His gay activism only makes me love him more.

2. Gregory Harrison - Well when I was a young gay boy I of course loved Gregory Harrison getting out of the shower on Trapper John M.D. - I think his "for ladies only" made for TV movie about male strippers sent me through puberty. However he made this list due to Facebook - since friending him I have learned of his great heart on behalf of the poor, the disenfranchised, minorities and the environment. He's more beautiful to me now.

1. Eric Ripert - I have no idea why but I think Eric Ripert is my husband. The lips, the eyes and his easy smile and charm. I just think he's destined to make me breakfast. (I'll even eat snails)

Yes there are a few others but this is a good list...Gosling I'm still yours baby!

The UFC needs to stop casual homphobia

To Dana White and the UFC,

I have been a fan of the "Ultimate Fighter" television show since the first season but I want to protest the casual homophobia in your last episode. (Series 7 Episode 8)

Your contestant C.B was being harassed by another contestant Cale. He called C.B. and Matthew “boyfriends” for wearing the same sunglasses. Let me point out first that there is nothing wrong with men being "boyfriends" in 2008.

When C.B. is asked who he wants to fight he says Cale because he called them "Fags" - you bleeped it out but it was obvious. At that point both your champions laugh and you (Dana White) have a smile on your face. It was this I was most offended by.

If a fighter came in and said he wanted to fight because someone called him the "N-word" there wouldn't have been all that laughing. In fact it's probably likely the person would have been removed from the show for having said that word.

I'm not expecting you to solve the homophobia problems of the typical heterosexual american male. (or in this case the "badass" variety) I am expecting that the UFC be a professional organization where homophobia is not tolerated or accepted.

You have tried hard to build the UFC from it's foundation as a controversial back alley fighting group to a professional sports organization. You lose some credibility if you let your contestants act in this manner without being called on it.

Thank you

Can you be arrested for tapping your foot?

Like most gay people I've been enjoying the Larry Craig scandal as it unfolds. It's always gratifying to see an anti-gay Republican being exposed as a hypocrite. My friend Jeff though made me stop to look into this matter further. What did he actually do to be accused of a crime? I read the police report.

Senator Craig:

He looked through the cracks of a stall

He tapped his foot

He put his foot on the officer's foot

He moved his fingers around under a stall

I had to stop and think. Is this worthy of a criminal arrest?? He wasn't playing with his privates at the urinal or peeking at others. He didn't show his privates under the stall or something.

I had to think - would I be "dancing on his grave" so gleefully if it had happened to someone else. What if it was openly gay Senator Barney Frank? I'd probably think it was embarrassing for my people but much ado about nothing really. I'd probably think the same thing I thought when George Michael got busted "Why is he looking for sex in a public bathroom??? He has cash and could pay for it. At the very least chat someone up and take them home"

What if it was a celebrity who we truly loved? What if it was John Travolta? (not saying he's gay - ALLEGEDLY as Kathy Griffin would say) I'd probably think "Why doesn't he just come out?" and again he could afford an escort.

I'm not defending people having sex in public bathrooms. They are not intended for that. However I would think at least there should be something more suggestive than that.

I'm a gay man. What if an attractive officer smiled at me in the rest room, if I smile back and act interested can I be arrested? Where does flirting and soliciting for sex cross the line?

What if the officer is playing with himself at the urinal? Is that entrapment if a gay man responds to that action?

Part of the reaction to this scandal is very appealing - the hypocritical gay bashing Senator getting caught soliciting gay sex. Another part makes me sad - He is in his 60's so he was alive pre-Stonewall, maybe he is a victim of homophobia he was taught. A self hating gay man having public sex - that is sad.

The other reaction I have is defensive. Some of the people reacting to this scandal are not reacting negatively because he was soliciting for sex. There are people reacting negatively because he is Gay. There is lots of Homophobia swirling around this debate from the Republicans. (and the Press - Tucker Carlson was making Gay bashing jokes)

This is a scandal because he pleaded guilty, his anti-gay voting record and the past complaints leveled against him. But I ask you - should people be arrested for tapping their foot?